Chad Winner Week 11

So we thought the election circus would be over on Saturday. Well, think again, because the circus has not left town yet, and worse still, there are a whole bunch of new clowns in the show, headed by Australia's own Buffalo Bill, Bob Katter. Katter is as mad as a cut snake, strutting around this two horse town wearing his ten gallon hat and a pair of colt 45s on his hips. Hopefully, while he is in town he and his posse can take out a few fuckwits. Because, once again, there have been plenty on show this week.

A special mention must be made of Labor power-broker, Mark Arbib. What an outstanding effort, you fuckwit. You engineered a massive swing against Labor when you and your faceless fuckwits knifed poor old Kevvy Rudd. The hillbillys in Queensland didn't like that too much, did they, Mark? Then you put Julia Gillard in charge - although we are not quite sure which one is the leader. All three are fuckwits, anyway. Then, after crying like a baby on Saturday night during the election, you were too scared to front Q&A on Monday night. You complete fuckwit.

But unfortunately, Arbib didn't have the numbers to make the top three fuckwits this week. No, the top three were - Fremantle coach Mark Harvey, AFL white maggot Scott McLaren and Mathew Newton.

Mark Harvey went very close to winning the Chad for sending Fremantle's mini league team to Tasmania to get slaughtered by Hawthorn. The results of tonight's game will determine if he is a fuckwit or just a plain wanker.

Scott McLaren. White maggot extraordinnaire. The fuckwit felt the need to hold a press conference to announce his retirement from the game to which he has brought into disrepute for 17 seasons. So long, you big nosed cheating prick.

Which takes us to this week's winner - Mathew Newton. He proved once and for all what a complete fuckwit he is by bashing his girlfriend. This comes on the day that an article was released about him suggesting he has got his act together. Good one. He makes Ben Cousins look like a member of the Women's Christian Temperance Union. No, this award his long overdue for Newton. Firstly, he is the son of Bert and Patty - that is grounds for a nomination alone. Then we had to witness his excrutiatingly bad performance in Underbelly - he had the worst kiwi accent since Martin Sneddon. And then he signed up to host the X-factor - just another completely crap show to pollute television screens. And to top all that off, he cowardly thumps his girlfriend who he is supposedly in love with. Newton, the only person you are in love with is yourself, so congratulations, you are this week's winner of the Chad medal. Enjoy sharing that prison cell with Big Bubba.