There were two contenders that stood out as leading fuckwits for the Eugene and The Chad this week. The winner of the Eugene is Rick Santorum, Republican candidate, sleeveless 'Harris Scarfe' sweater wearer, Bible-Bashing Christian cockhead, holier than thou ignorant fuckwit. Fair dinkum, Obama doesn't need to do anything at the moment with fuckwits like this in opposition. Old Prick outdid himself recently with his comment regarding Obama's statement about how he wants everyone in America to go to college. The fuckwit made the comment "what a snob". I''m sure if Obama was to provide a retort to this it would be "what a knob". Yep, what a terrible thing if more people were educated, wouldn't it be terrible if more people came to realise pretentious, Jesus spouting religious fuckarses like you should be kept as far away from public office as possible. You're a fucking joke you clown, you're going to get knocked off in the race for the Republican candidacy by a cunt named Mitt for fucksake.
So that brings us to the Winner of The Chad Medal - Summer Series for this week, Pope Benedict XVI. What a fuckwit. He presides over possibly the most hypocritical establishment in the world, The Catholic Church, an establishment that preaches peace and goodwill to all man yet has a long and sordid history of human rights abuses and intolerance. To give you some idea of the man that is the Pope, here's a quick run down on the man himself.
Born in 1927 in Bavaria he did fuck all of interest up until 1941 when he joined the Hitler Youth, a group who if I'm not mistaken were a goose stepping pack of anti-semetic little arseholes. According to his brother, the Pope ( who obviously wasn't called that at this early stage but I can't be rooted reciting his full name every time I mention the fucken old turd ) was an " unenthusiastic member who refused to attend meetings " . Yeah righto, ahhh bullshit. I saw The Sound of Music as a kid, those little Hitler Youth cunts fucken loved it. In 1943 he was trained in the German anti-aircraft corps, and later the German infantry . Starting to sound a bit like a little Austrian bloke with a bad temper and one testicle missing who was sniffing around at that time. In 1945 he showed he wasn't too keen on this fighting business as he deserted his post when the allies started getting a bit too close. So even at this early stage he sounds shonky, doesn't fuck or fight.
After a spell in a POW camp ( the allies weren't fooled ) he rejoined a seminary he had attended before the war put a dampener on things and in in 1951 he was ordained a priest. His recollection of the ordination goes as follows " at the moment the elderly Archbishop laid his hands on me, a little bird - perhaps a lark, flew up from the altar in the high cathedral and trilled a joyful song ". Elderly clergy laying their hands on young people, doesn't sound familiar at all does it. From then on his life for the next 40 odd years consisted of being a theologian, professor, and god sprouting toga wearing kraut, all boring shit that you don't want to hear about, trust me I read all about it and it bored the shit out of me. God blah blah, no don't confess that we'll cover up your crimes you child molesting cunt blah blah.
In 2005 he became the Pope. He took the name Benedict after an Italian Pope who served the role during WW1, not a great shock with his penchant for running away from an incoming army that he took the name of a bloke that came a country with the military prowess of Gomer Pyle and courage of Daniel Wicks under a high ball. Almost immediately he continued the image of the Church as being an out of touch, insular pack of fuckarses in respect to their approach to kiddy fiddlers in the clergy, contraception, IVF, AIDS, world affairs, and a general intolerance and lack of acceptance of different religions, cultures, and their customs. Don't believe me? Check out some of these pearlers the old cunt trotted out:
- Lifted the excommunication of a Bishop who was an outspoken Holocaust denier. Even the krauts throw you in the can for that these days. Not a great shock though considering the Vatican helped some of the perpetrators of the Holocaust escape justice.
- In reference to Islam he commented - "Show me just what Muhammed has brought that was new and there you will find things only evil and inhuman, such as his command to spread by the sword the faith he preached''. Not an untrue statement but a bit fucken rich coming from the Catholic Church. Ever read that big boring book they call the Bible? It's full of Catholics slaying people in the name of God, I saw a doco a little while back about Joshua and you don't reckon he smote the fuck out of people, women, kids, you name it.
- With regard to Native Sth Americans he said that the native populations had been "silently longing" for the Christian faith brought to Sth America by colonizers. He also said "the proclamation of Jesus and his Gospel did not at any point involve an alienation of the pre-Columbus culture, nor was it the imposition of a foreign culture". Fuck off you wanker, you know what the colonizers did to Sth America? Rape, pillage and plunder and smote the fuck out of anyone who disagreed with their thinking. Yeah I'll bet they would have been silently longing to be murdered or have their whole way of life torn away from them you cockhead.
- Called on people to discover ethics in business and economic relations. Ethics, the Catholic Church telling other people to discover ethics, hahaha you're fucking hilarious.
- Said "Adolescents, youths and even children are the easy victims of the corruption of love, deceived by unscrupulous adults who, lying to themselves and them, draw them into the dead-end streets of consumerism". Sounds a bit like your mob, just substitute the last four words of that statement to say "pervasive filth and hypocrisy that is the Catholic Church"
- Whilst Pope was accused in a lawsuit of conspiring to cover up the molestation of 3 boys from Texas, but sought and obtained diplomatic immunity from prosecution. Got something to hide?
- Is vehemently against couples using IVF to conceive children as it's "the arrogance of taking the place of the creator". If the creator was so fucken good why did he not bestow upon these people the power to conceive naturally, what's his fucken point in teasing these poor bastards, many who would make excellent parents. Answer - God is a cunt.
- In 2010 promised to change in the way sex abuse cases are dealt with. He also promised to introduce measures that would "safeguard young people in the future", and "bring to justice"priests responsible for abuse. So that coverup in Texas, do you think justice was served there?
- In 2010 used the example of male prostitutes , that condom use, with the intention of reducing HIV infection, may be an indication that the prostitute is intending to reduce the evil connected with his or her immoral activity. No. I'm pretty sure they're trying to stop themselves from dying. And anyway, aren't you the mob that consider Mary Magdalene to be a saint? If I'm not mistaken she was a fucken prostitute!
So if you were in any doubt why the Pope won the award this week, there's your evidence. He peddles his word in the name of the almighty, in fact all he peddles is a pile of hypocritical shit. For a bloke who wrote an encyclical in 2009 called 'Caritas in Veritate' or 'Love in truth' ,it's a pity he doesn't follow his own teachings. Take your award and fucken choke on it.
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