Adelaide Crows, you lucky pricks. Any other week and you would have stitched up at least one of the awards. First you recruit a fucken plank like Kurt Tippett, then you pay him a good quid despite him doing fuck all. Then as his contract nears an end you offer him a bucketload of cash to stay. But wait there's more. In order to sweeten the deal they make a ' secret agreement ' that lets him go to the club of his choice after his new contract expires. Only problem was they didn't keep it secret because some dumbfuck put the details in an email.Oops. So the cunts have been caught out trying to cheat the system there but it gets even funnier when we find out the cunts have been rorting the salary cap as well to pay for this giant turd who makes Randall Bone look like Royce Hart. It was jolly good of you to contact the AFL to confess your crimes, but I'll bet you wouldn't have said fucken boo if you hadn't been caught you fucken wankers.I hope they throw the book, the kitchen sink, and the whole fucken house at you. Make all the excuses you want, plea for mercy, you can get fucked, take what's coming, I and other footy followers are laughing our fucking tits off. Eat shit.
The Eugene goes to former host of Jim'll Fix It, pommie 'entertainer' Jimmy Saville. Rumours have been abound for years that he was a filthy cunt who liked touching up young kids, and now he's done the world a favour and pegged it, it's been revealed that there are over 300 allegations of him being a kiddy fiddler. 300 for fucksake. The poms generally turned a blind eye claiming he was just an eccentric, just a fucken pervert more like it. They even knighted the cunt for fucksake. Not surprisingly the Catholic Church also bestowed 'honours' upon him, giving him a Papal knighthood in 1990, not sure what for exactly but with the track record of that mob they probably knew what he was like and gave him his Papal pat on the head for services to child molestation. So why was this prick allowed to get away with these heinous crimes for the best part of 50 years? Did he have dirt on others involved in the same disgusting practices? Or did people just sweep it under the carpet and hope it would stop,well the arseholes that knew are guilty, they could've brought the fucker down and did nothing. Many may recall Jimmy Saville as a personality, an eccentric, a character. The truth is he is nothing but a repulsive child molesting rapist. He deserves nothing in death but the revulsion of all, fuck you Jimmy, rot in hell.
So that leaves us with the winner of The Chad Medal - Lance Armstrong. 7 time winner of the Tour de France, cancer survivor, lying drug cheat. Which do you reckon he will be most remembered for? In a sport that's known for being as dodgy as a Craig Thomson expense account he is the king. He shits on David Copperfield, he's pulled one of the greatest ruses you'd want to see. When he won all those Tour de France titles people lauded him as a magnificent athlete, a beacon to all those who have suffered that you can triumph through adversity. What a fucken sham that was, he was cooked. And not only that, he coerced, intimidated and threatened others into doing the same. When fellow riders, doctors etc made accusations of him being on more drugs than Keith Richards he continually pleaded innocence, and said he was being victimised.But the truth has emerged, you're a crook, right up with such luminaries as Marion Jones, Ben Johnson, and fellow one nard and rampant drug user Adolf Hitler. So you think saying nothing will convince people of your innocence? Get fucked uniball the only reason you have kept silent recently is you know you're fucked and if you admit the truth you're in line for a stint in the can. So take your Chad Medal cunt, it's the only award you've earned for a long fucken time.
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