Summer Series Week 6 Nominees

• French Michael Jackson fans - about 100 of these wankers are suing Conrad Murray for emotional damage caused by the uni-gloved kiddy fiddlers death. How about the emotional damage he caused to the kids he had at the Never Neverland Ranch. It's no surprise the French embraced MJ though, just like his backwards moving moonwalk the French have excelled in retreating, from invading armies, from deodorant, from being decent humans instead of arrogant fucken pigs.

• The 3 Australian protesters who boarded a Japanese Whaling vessel - what fucken dickheads. They get on the boat and proceed to tell the Japs go away. The Japs unsurprisingly say fruck you and lock the cunts up. Larry Curly and Moe respond by going on a hunger strike. Yep that's going to have them shitting razor blades, this is a race of people who starved and tortured thousands of Aussie and Pommie soldiers to death on the Burma Railway, do you think they are going to give a fuck if you don't want to eat? And do you think they give a fuck about it causing a diplomatic issue, they're butchering whales like Glenelg butcher a finals series, they don't give a shit you fucken idiots. Then after making their ' brave ' stance and the Japs had enough of their bullshit and told em to fuck off, the cunts want the Aussie Government to spend thousands of TAX PAYER DOLLARS to go and rescue them. That's my money being pissed up against a wall to rescue 3 cunts who we should've paid the Japs to make fish food out of.

• Tina Marion Riechfeldt, Garry Paul Reichfeldt and Kathleen Modystack - plead guilty in court this week to committing bestiality. Most people have had the odd stage where they've been a bit hard up for a root but fucken hell what sort of sick cunt roots animals. Graham Cornes I guess.

• INXS - what number lead singer are these pricks on now? Just quit for fucksake, you're turning into a bigger joke than Coldplay. Next lead singer - Peter Andre

• Jon Blake - pissed and moaned because his slapper of a missus was asked to kindly change her top as she was causing people to spew up their food in a hotel restaurant. Fair dinkum no one wants to see an overcooked pigs trotter in a see through top, think yourself lucky they didn't call the pound.

• John Riddell - quit his radio gig on Mix102.3 because he didn't want to get up early in the mornings anymore. Or was it because they shitcanned your request for more dough you bald headed chicken fucker? Mind you how they managed to fit his head and Jodie 'Bill' Oddy's chin in the same studio is a fucken mystery in the first place.

• George Clooney - according to George his greatest fear in life is " Hurting someone " and "can't stand the idea of making another person miserable" . Well stop making fucking movies then you condescending arsewipe.

• Kim Jong-Un - The lardarse son of Kim Jong-Il and new leader of Nth Korea, and if I'm not mistaken a bloody good likeness to South Park's Eric Cartman.

• UK parents banning their kids from watching the cartoon Peppa Pig - they reckon it's a bad influence on their kids. I bet you let em watch Coronation Street and Eastenders with you though don't you you fuckwits, that's not only bad influence, it's fucken child abuse.

• Normie Rowe - For that shithouse fucken Coles ad - no added hormones. I don't know about Coles produce but old Normie's been on some serious gear, have you seen the cunt? I remember when he got into the dustup on the Ray Martin Show and he looked like Davey Crockett, now the cunt looks like Ellen DeGeneres, hey Normie - no lezzo hormones.

• Foxtel - gave Rove a second season. Two words - drive-by shooting.

• Jason Donovan - for announcing a comeback. First song on his new album is " I'm on the drugs that killed River Phoenix ". Fair dinkum who would be retarded enough to give that tone deaf junkie another go, maybe INXS.

• Westpac, Commonwealth Bank and ANZ - have all announced they will be cutting staff despite posting very fucking tidy profits for the last year. I wonder what their CEO's will be paid to sack all of these poor cunts.

• Tiriel Mora - Dennis Denuto from 'The Castle' was convicted of assaulting his missus whilst on the piss watching last years AFL GF. He gets nominated for two reasons, he's a pissweak cunt for giving his missus one, and he must be a fucken Collingwood supporter cause everyone else thought last year's GF was fucken hilarious.

• Malcolm Fox - has offered to settle a compo claim lodged by the victim of his busy hands. He also has decided not to appeal his conviction. Hang on Malcolm, I thought you said you were innocent, I guess the fucken Possum Magic has worn off.

• Ben Cousins - cooked himself again then went arse up in rehab and did a Molly Meldrum. Fucken space cadet.

• Tour Down Under wannabes - yep I'm talking to you cunts who are 25kg+ overweight and pour yourselves into a shockingly inappropriate lycra outfit once a year and think you're a tour De France contender. Stay the fuck off the road and stay the fuck out of my way. I'm gonna start driving with a broom in my car for the next couple of weeks and when I see these cunts riding 5-6 astride taking up the road I'm trying to travel on I'm gonna ram it in their fucken spokes.

• Teresa Bambaro - Federal Opposition Citizenship Spokeswoman who apologised for saying immigrants should be taught the importance of wearing deodorant and waiting in queues without pushing. Don't fucken apologise, you told the truth.

• Peter Charles Deering - sex offender who has spent the last 30yrs in Glenside Hospital is apparently a shell of his former self and thus his lawyer wants to move him to a nursing home. How about we make the cunt a corpse of his former self and move him to a six foot hole in the fucken ground.

• Jeffrey Drew Wiltschke - US frootloop who recently changed his name to Beezow Doo-Doo Zoppitybop-Bop-Bop was arrested by police after complaints of his excessive drinking and drug-taking near a park. Didn't know Ben Cousins had rellies in the US.

• The US Republican Party - 'Baseball' Mitt Romney, 'Pissed as a' Newt Gingrich, Ron Paul 'Jeremy'. 3 of the main contenders for the Republican Party's nomination to challenge Obama. Why not put Ronald McDonald and the fucken Hamburglar in as well, fucken Americans.

• Anthony Worrall - 'star'of the UK version of Ready Steady Cook has been pinched for shoplifting from Tescos five times over the Christmas period. Ready Steady Cook not Supermarket Sweep you fucknut.

• Justin Beiber - " I want to be someone who is respected ". Good luck with that cunt, you've got as much chance of that happening as Malcolm Fox has of becoming a primary school teacher

• Bendigo Hungry Jacks - fined $46,000 after they "volunteered" to pay back $104,000 to staff, mainly junior employees. Ripping off young kids who are getting $6-$7 an hour, and they were wondering why people were complaining of phlegm pickles in their whoppers.