Week 17 Winner

The winner of The Chad Medal this week came down to a field of two, the low scum who chucked a bag of live puppies in a garbage bin and The Wiggles. The piece of shit that went to the trouble of putting the puppies in a garbage bag, sealing it, then wrapping a blanket round the bag before chucking it in a bin wins the Eugene this week as that is a dirty fucken cunt act performed by someone who deserves to have their nards ( or lady nards ) lopped off with a rusty blade. What the fuck is wrong with some people, you can just dump the dogs off at the RSPCA and at least they stand a chance, or at worse get put down humanely. Only one dog survived, the others died in that bag, and that's better than you deserve you fucken scumbag cunt.
So that leaves us with The Wiggles as the winner of The Chad Medal for this week. If you are a parent you will be sick of seeing and hearing these arseholes 'singing' and dancing round like a middle aged creep trying to crack it for a root at grab a grannie night at The Arkaba. If you don't have kids and know as much about them you are fucked in the head. They started life as 80's band The Cockroaches, and they should've kept the name, it fucken suits em. They have made millions pandering to young kids and making parents lives miserable. If you've ever found yourself humming to Everybody Hop, Hot Potato or any of their other fucken songs, had to dance with your kid as they sing I'm Dorothy the fucken Dinosaur, or be forced to watch a fucken pasta cook off with the shittiest acting seen since Matthew Newton in Underbelly you know the pain that these cunts have inflicted on the world. And just when you think that's the end of them and hope and pray that they'll fuck off for good, they come out with a new album, cd or tour and it starts all over again, thereby fleecing your pockets and causing migraines and bleeding ears. FUUUUUUUUUCK.
Hopes were raised that retirement was imminent with the news that the yellow Wiggle ( or as he shall be known The Yellow Cuntle ) Greg got crook and had to hang up the boots. But ahh fuck they replaced him with Sam, not a bad idea in hindsight as they now had at least one member that was born before the Boer War and didn't piss his pants. So this Sam nugget kept helping The Cuntles peddle their wares to the kids, and bankrupting parents. Until one fine day Greg said " fuck me I'm a bit short of coin, how about shitcanning this young bloke and getting me back. I still can't stand and need a fucken guide dog to find the stage, but she's fucken apples lads ". And they did it, they took Sam in to a meeting one day and gave him the fucken pink slip with no warning. What a fucken dog cunt act. What then makes this worse is that about 18 months later three of the pricks, including the newly returned Greg, say it's time to pull up stumps, but not before we have a 12 month goodbye tour. Who are ya, John Farnham? As my contemporary Laurie Holden would say "if it walks like a duck and talks like a duck .....", this was a fucken stitch up, they knew when they shitcanned Sam that this was on the cards, it's as shifty as a Craig Thomson credit card bill.
So do you think we now get a break from them - FUCK NO,for they have chosen replacements to take over after they drive off in their big red car full of my fucken money. A gimp who looks like he should be in Sturt guernsey, a prick who looks like he should be advertising gotta getta gutters, and a big nosed ranga sheila. What the fuck? What colours are these wankers going to be, the Sturt poof would have to be the turquoise Cuntle, the gotta getta gutter gonad would be the shit brown Cuntle, and the ranga chick would have to be the new red Cuntle ( well, at least once a month anyway ). The only original cast member staying is the blue Cuntle Anthony. Cheesy grinned motherfucker he is, not surprising then that not long ago their choreographer was alleged to have been getting her hot potato mixed up with his mashed banana. So Murray, the red Cuntle is gone, back to working with his peers at Phoenix, Greg the yellow Cuntle is gone , until he pops up on A Current Affair again bemoaning how he's fucken broke, and ends up knifing the gotta getta gutter Cuntle to get his job back again, Jeff the purple Cuntle ( and while I'm at it you don't think that falling asleep business was part of his act, he is an old crone, he was genuinely asleep, the Abraham Simpson Cuntle )is gone, off to hold the ladder for Molly Meldrum. 
Goodbye to the Cuntles
A pity it's not all of you
You're back stabbing arseholes
And that you can't deny
Hooroo, fuck off, bye.